You don't know me.

In therapy, they teach you certain skills to help you manage your life independently. One of these skills is being able to stand back, recognise patterns, find the root cause of them, and tackle it directly in order to solve the problems. So I guess when I look at the mess of my love life, they all play out the same way. Everything is great for the first while, I am chatty and confident and flirty. I know all the right things to ask and what to say. But this only seems to last a few weeks, sometimes months if I'm lucky. Then, when things slowly start to progress, they learn more about me, I open up a little, become softer, they learn all my quirks and anxieties and listen to me yap for hours. Only then, they suddenly pull back, reply less, find excuses, become distant. So I guess, judging from the pattern of things, I've learned that... knowing me more, means loving me less. So I stopped letting people know me.