the last reserve

i always felt inadequate around you. so unfulfilling. so why keep me around? why torture me? just let me go. please. instead of forcing me to sit on the side lines and watch as you get to parade around and be free. like the last numbered player in the game, i am the reserve, no, i am the last reserve. only when absolutely everyone else is ruled out, am i called upon. when you are bored and no one else is available you will always have me to fall back on, the backup. i am made to stay, just incase, with no intention of ever actually wanting me. i am compelled to sit idly by in misery and observe your every move, but never allowed to find another team to play with.