that look...

i've probably spent hours staring at your beauty and studying every inch of you. i pretend not to notice. but i know every one of your looks. i know what every silly face you pull means. you have your hungry look. your giddy, childish kind of pure joy and happiness look. your confused look. your sleepy look. your shocked look. your fake smile, "i can't stand this person" look. your angry look. your "i'm mad at you, but can't stand how adorable you are" look. your "i'm pretending not to care" look. your "please don't catch me looking" look. your overthinking look. your nervous look. your "i won't admit that i'm hurt" look. your goofy "trying to make me laugh" look. your "lost deep in thought" look. your "i'm sorry" puppy dog look. and then there's the look you gave me today. i seen a different look, one i didn't recognise, one i've never seen before. in that moment, my heart fell to my stomach as your gentle crooked smile and your soft eyes gazed deeply into my soul. and i'm torn between thinking it was your "i'm falling in love" look and your "i'm done now..." look. and the truth is, i don't think i want to find out. because neither will have a happy ending.